It was a thought form that drifted into my awareness early one morning as I was finishing up my
yoga and ready to step into the chill Merritt morning to toss hay to my herd already staring
holes through the windows at me….but it demanded to be written. I wonder…where does this stuff come from?
Perhaps it came about through being pulled through the key hole backwards, you know, out of the fire for a little more hammering and finishing. Ah, the Grace of tension….
I’ve come to realize that a large portion of my life lesson homework package is about accepting and embracing my Power and I have been skipping out…alot. And so it was I was musing on this confounding piece of information that had been brought to me via one more pop quiz and assignment uncompleted when I had this very very cool metaphor wash through me.
It went like this:
Not accepting all the good that flows into me by immediately sharing it to “empower” others or sharing your hard won and well deserved skill and knowledge before it has nurtured you is EXACTLY like not accepting a compliment. The energy just passes straight through you.
Think of a plant in a pot with over dry soil-the water when it comes, just flows right on through and the plant just barely gets enough, needs more right away and looks half starved and desperate. The problem occurs when we do not accept the nourishment(water, love,nurturing,energy…) that the Universe just pours out with ease and abundance.
Would the plant ever put up an umbrella to keep out the water? Why do we, when we do something as ‘simple’ as deflect a compliment, or give to much of ourselves when we have not received the nurturing that is ours first by harboring a deep belief that we are not worthy of water…love…money…creativity…support…happiness…truth?
I have been busy trading the universe’s gift to me of water for love and friendship, saying ‘no, I’m ok…I don’t need water’, sharing my ‘water’ ei. life force, time, energy, money skills, knowledge or love or maybe even taking other’s water in desperation, but the plant(me, in case you hadn’t worked that out) does not have to “be worthy”. “Do right”. “Deserve”. It just IS because it exists.
That it is worthy is completely irrelevant.
Of course it is. And we are.
Allow yourself to RECEIVE that which the Universe so easily shares and nurtures its creations. And so as the plant soaks up the water that flows to it with ease, joy and gratitude and the soil becomes rich and loamy, the plant….Blooms.
And right then and there it hit me square on the noggin.
It’s not about sharing the WATER! Its about sharing the FLOWERS!
It is not the WATER the plant needs to share…there is water enough for everyone, and indeed…it is the Universes job to provide the water. But, it is the unique, glorious, individual, beautiful FLOWERS that bring joy! What we grow into and become in all sorts of wondrous and unique ways THAT is our gift to share back with the world. WOW! No wonder I feel stripped, empty and dried out. I have been giving away my water and scraping by, barely shooting up a scraggly bloom from time to time…
Allow yourself to receive…Oh my God! This whole time I had it backwards! I assumed the order was to Give and then Receive…but it is
Because you are
And then Give!
You see when we little humans allow our egos to get in the way (cloaked nicely in humility, selflessness, spirituality, and martyrdom of course) and we somehow manage to convince ourselves that we are the Source of the water and doesn’t that just set us up for failure and a constant battle for control and quasi god-ness? Really? Who did I think I was trying to take over someone else’s job? No wonder the struggles, the seemingly hopelessness I’ve felt sometimes…my job is to be me.
Of course we are worthy! We would not exist if we were not, so it does not even come into the question any longer. The Real question is “Will you Receive?”
And accept with Grace, gratitude and allow yourself to bloom for it is our unique flower that is the truest expression of a Universe flowing in harmony and joy and creation. Allow others to see the beauty of your flowers, smell them…even have cut flowers in the kitchen, woven into the hair of our horses, flung up into a crazy blue sky. A healthy, happy growing plant just makes more, easy as pie.
Now, think about this. Sometimes the plant can become root bound, can’t retain any water, no more room to grow and again the water runs straight through, barely retaining any, requiring many frequent waterings even to survive. In this state we are constantly on the look out for our next feeding, sourcing out others energy again as we have no reserves of our own but this time because we have out grown where we are and have not yet ‘transplanted’ ourselves. Now what we need is a big, new empty pot (the unknown), lots of fresh dirt and fertilizer (usually a happy by-product of being stuck:), plenty of water ( Source and/or Self care) and pull ourselves up out of the old pot. Of course what often happens is we have left ourselves in that old pot FAR to long and have actually grown into the the fibre of the pot and can’t get pulled out. That’s when the pot needs to be shattered…
To get us out, sometimes parts of us are ripped off, torn and we sure can have a set-back, get all wilted and have a hard time settling into the new pot. Hmmm, it’s pretty clear from this analogy that here is when we REALLY need self care, water, and thoughtful attention to help the adjustment…again the plant just receives. It cannot give at this cycle. But once the plant has adjusted, oh boy!
Watch out! Just look at it grow now! Oh and was that tiny little buds I see popping up???? Ha! Might want to try re-potting a bit more often:)
Somehow, this epiphany has changed everything for me. To remember that the water is free, always available, joyously given of Source to nurture and feed us to bloom in a full and outrageously spectacular expression that is ours and ours alone, which then in return, feeds the world with all its glory…OUR Gift to share.