Tag: awareness

Seven Half Diamond, 2010

Posted on by Stefanie in Blog

Ok. Ok….Apparently I cannot help sharing some of these great photos from all these Camps. Each one I swear was my favorite, each one special and full of the best kind of people….Enjoy! So these are from the Seven Half Diamond Camp in August, and what a blessing to be at a higher altitude during the hottest week in Merritt in the summer! In town was 36 degrees Celsius, up at 7.5, a balmy 30….MUCH more conducive to hanging out and learning with horses.. The Cabin was cool and such a focal point, with its lake views, shady porches and all the comforts of home in a beautiful, lovingly hand made way. With enough privacy, yet camaraderie, good food, laughs and tears (yes, all the really good camps have tears, don’t they?)were in definite abundance, it was one of the best parts of this week. Four good friends, 2 from the Island, 2 from Pritchard came together to meet and re-unit with their horses and I left the theme of the week up to them to dictate, and I suppose it really should be no surprise that it ended up being all about Feel…hahahaha! It is simply inescapable and insistent in being brought to our full awareness……. So...what better way to start then with the (soon to be infamous:) Waiting Game? Once again peace descends upon the area, as horses await they time to come in at free choice to be with their human. Each one different in their methodology of the approach, yet each one intensely focused, almost in a microcosm, unsure, curious, seemingly indifferent at times, certainly unsettled at the turn of events and checking out what every other being is doing, until they all, horse and human alike reach stillness and presence….and that wondrous magic occurs yet again…..This is truly an exercise that will effect you like no other. We ended the first day with a casual trail ride up the pipeline, enjoying the shade and quiet time to be ‘with‘ our horses…. and oh ok! And a really good loooong gallop up the grassy hills…:) Long trotting out brought some interesting reactions from both species, horses adapting somewhat quicker the the humans to this seemingly innocent enough task and we dwindled to 1/2 the group rising with the sun to repeat the next morning. And what a treat! The cool, sweet smelling pines and damp grasses swishing as our horses hooves beat out a regular cadence as we rode the grassland trails, up and down hills, through stands of aspen and finishing up by the misty lake and the call of the loons…almost a surreal morning. The last day was a competition of sorts involving a course with certain requirements and obstacles that participants had a bare exposure to at the outset. As well as being timed, marks were added for exceptional feel and awareness of their horses individual needs. To watch everyone get so soft and connected with their horses was astonishing! To see the expansion of Consciousness; for the slightest try, the softest ask, the most generous allow and the grace of knowing when a threshold of confidence had been reached.
What a group!

One last ride out , experimenting with ponying and all it entails which is such a powerful lesson and boy! It sure allows us to be clearly the leader and how it can give that all needed focus and intention to our riding, not to mention exercise to that second horse always left at home…. moving a few head of cattle, a splash in the lake and then the sad packing up, cleaning and loading all our toys and memories up…and off to our respective corners of the world again…. Thanks Roma and Keeper, Tracy and Mesa, Deb and Topper and Cheryl and Magic !

From Ignorance to Bliss….

Posted on by Stefanie in Uncategorized

It doesn’t really surpise me that I have not taken any photos of her.

She just has that effect on the world and has just as little expectation back of it.

Just a small bay mare, not quite a horse, not quite a pony, plain face and body( complete with the hyper-vigilant ewe-neck) with 16 yrs of calloused indifference to life and humans. She had zero pride in herself, scruffy and unkept, and would roll in the muddiest, urine soaked corner of her pen. Add to this a developing tendency to extreme reactions when asked to do the simplest things and as a result was beginning to hurt people. At an age when most horses are starting to become labeled as “dependable”,”steady” “Broke” she was just broken. Embittered, resentful, hard and ill- mannered. Somehow this small, unremarkable mare managed to bring out the very worst in those around her, and anger was the main emotion. My first week working with her, ” Ignorant” was the word I found myself mentally using on her…………….

I would try all the usual methods I have developed to connect in the first week, and met with absolute failure. I sat in her pen, took her grazing, brushed with super soft brush, played the ‘waiting game’, moved her around on-line gently establishing lines of respect and communication, looked for her itchy spots.

Nothing.

She would allow me to catch her, but that reaction of running off/rearing/turning away/focused on her buddies/flinging her head in the air was a constant presence and to be honest, I felt myself becoming just as triggered as everyone else had handling this mare….”Ignorant Cow” I would mutter under my breathe as she flew backwards for the 6th time as I attempted to brush the crusted filth her mane……

And then I got MAD!

MAD, MAD, MAD!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I can’t even begin to tell you how p-d off I was! Here is this little horse, hard, calloused, ignorant and ugly struggling with me for her survival, and all because SHE was the one treated Ignorantly by Ignorant people. Ignorant in every meaning of the word to be sure, but the damage was done. This horse could wear pressure in some places (on her sides and mouth) like crazy, and had zero tolerance for any (on her sides and mouth) in other places. And those crazy reactions? Simply her capacity for being treated ‘ignorantly’ had been reached,her intolerance to engaging in the simplest of tasks reflecting it. She simply would not bend to human will any longer. This ended up being her saving grace, and thus she ended up here with me. Having lived with emotional distance as protection, and trust a trigger word, I could relate when I finally allowed myself to feel her…..

What I found under the hardness was a gift of tenderness. Like a freshly exfoliated callous, there is super sensitive new tissue. And raw fear, of course. Lack of trust knowing what would be the point in it anyway, as it must have brought confusion and (to her anyway) a threat to her very survival.

For me, it was the tiny moments of pure relaxation, when her erratic breathing calmed ( and this was just standing with her folks), when I felt her surprise when I acknowledged her slightest try with a certain degree of consistency, when I told her she was beautiful and very clever (and truly meant it) when we figured something out together……When I felt her begin to enjoy (even for a few strides) our rides together, when she knew that she was right with me and I would completely leave her alone, loose rein and rubs on the neck…”Good Girl”! blow blow blow….
When she would challenge my leadership with a couple bucks, and attempts to return to home and I would emphatically correct her….then leave her alone, trusting her to chose comfort with me, and then yesterday………….

After a new trail along the river complete with bridges, cows, and torrential rain, we sauntered in, loose reined and low headed completely tuned in to one another and unconcerned with any horse on the property, with eyes that followed me as we untacked and such softness in her body as I brushed the rain soaked hair best that I could, and felt such incredible tenderness well up in me towards this little brave mare for showing and reflecting yet another piece of the puzzle ………of horses, myself and life.

I believe no one means to harden another soul on purpose, it happens from ignorance, lack of awareness, low level of consciousness. How often does force come into play when knowledge runs out? Or simply the willingness to connect and pay attention to that whom we are interacting? To slow down and feel, and see, and hear, and be present? How often do we attempt to attach blame instead of simply trying to understand? I come away feeling we are all trying the best we can, but hoping that we all have the courage to seek a change for the better as our heroine of this tale did…

Thank you, beautiful little bay mare…………


Finding a Feel

Posted on by Stefanie in Uncategorized

So….we did it! Just fresh back from the Island and the Finding a Feel Workshop with Alexa Linton in Duncan….! What a weekend! And Twin Creeks is such a idyllic spot to hold the workshop, with the weather co-operating perfectly as well it unfolded as 7 brave folks explored a new frontier of Feel…and broke the ice on some very fascinating depths and challenged themselves to slow down, breathe and gently enter their horses world, on their terms. A challenging topic to teach historically ( and for real, I might add!) but intensely important and the next piece for a more complete picture of our horsemanship journey. I for one, again became a student as the the roles are constantly flowing between student and teacher; horse and human.


Feedback loops of soft tries, hard spots, awkward moments, judgments, raw spots, tender connections, belly laughs, and surprises of insight. Touching the places in stillness where we so often shy away from with our busy minds and allowing the space for our horses to come to us….


This certainly was a different clinic lots of meditation, exploring our senses and beliefs, becoming open to new possibilities of interactions with our equine partner with things we take for granted such as bridling and leading, and how they can hold such learning and connection for us……

Alexa’s work with body talk, energy reading and intuitive readings was truly remarkable with epiphany’s everywhere all weekend. She did a great job of leading us through the fascinating Meditations and being such a pleasure to work with…the scope of Alexa’s knowledge and feel, dovetailing perfectly with my exploration of awareness and sensitivity of the horses……blending into a uniquely personal journey for all.





I loved the ‘Feel’ of this weekend.


The easy camaraderie, laughter, questions raised, and support shown for all of that are us fascinated in raising our understanding of this horse/ human connection, with all its rewards, mirroring, interweaving of lessons and deep truths. It was a pleasure to witness and be a part of and Heartfelt Thanks to all who participated and allowed Alexa and myself to be both student and teacher alongside you and your horses….. There is still a couple spaces available for the Squamish Feel workshop in September if this causes any interest to raise up in you……:)

This Phenomenal series of photos were taken once again, by my unsung Best Friend and support Crew Chief of Staff…….

Inet Sladecek!

Thanks, Sister!…without your insight, talents and friendship, I would sure not be where I am….:)

The Look on Their Face

Posted on by Stefanie in Uncategorized

Saturday night I headed to Kamloops to give my good friend Danielle a lesson and have dinner, and since her husband was on a boys ‘road trip’ picking up irrigation pipe, that left us with free rein to talk ceaselessly about horses….alas! Dan sent Larry to me a couple years ago as a just backed mature horse ( a woman never tells her real age!). And yes, Larry is a mare and a fairly accurate photo of her is at the top of the page. Well, accurate THEN. As you may be able to tell, Larry was a wee bit, er, suspicious of pretty near everything, especially us vertical beings. Difficult to catch, completely indifferent to any attempt to connect, mentally and emotionally resistant. It took awhile and some real commitment from us humans first, but Larry is a changed girl. I wish I had an operable camera ( hint, hint!) so that I could have captured her expression the last few times I have seen her. Soft, soft, soft. Comes right up to visit. Full on eye contact. Completely engaged, all cylinders firing, hi how are ya doin’. I’m Larry! Dan tells me this is Larry’s new default setting, and we got to visiting about that and she said after our clinic last weekend, that she learnt that the only thing she had to do was figure out how to keep that look on Larry’s face.

To Cool! Wow! Zoowie! and B-I-N-G-O!
How true is this! Remember horses are our feedback loop, and Dan hit on a clear barometer for herself and her horse and if she keeps this in the back of her mind as she engages with and learns from her girl, she will find her way. THIS will be her teacher, her guide and ‘Feel-meter’. If Larry glazes over, becomes difficult to catch ( and yes folks, that means if you have to look at their bum first!), tilts her head away or up, pins her ears, slashes her tail, crawls her skin…..and that is where it starts. Even less really. Brace, over or under sensitivity, buck, bolt, cinchy, bad bridler, balker, ‘disrespectful’,blah blah blah blah.

Really! Did any one ever actually take the time, invest their awareness and slow down enough to perceive the creature in front of them? Now, I am not saying we never rattle their cage so to speak, but on the other hand, there we be a whole lot less cage rattlin’ goin’ on if we all slowed down, observed what our actions were doing to cause what reaction in the horse and play around with adjusting them.

I guess here is where I will share my Short Mantra for myself and Lodestar….

Do Less……..Feel More…………Be Conscious.

What I mean by this is almost without FAIL if something is not working with your equine relationship, the answer it not to do more…..DO LESS. This will mean stopping what is obviously not working and considering the next move.

Notice I did not say think about your next step. I suggest Feeling your way. How would YOU like to be treated in the particular situation?…hmmmmmm. What are you feeling? Chances are pretty good that your horse is feeling the same darn thing. Ask again and FEEL the slightest try and quit. Sometimes this means for the moment, minute, session, week. Just like they were intelligent beings, they know how to do everything already anyway, its just doing things with us that is the tricky bit……………! If you are in doubt about trusting your feeling on when to quit and was that a small try and when does it get better…….just wait and watch. It does and will, and you will see more and feel more….:) All this becomes easier with desire to see.

Becoming conscious of what our horses are doing really just requires us to want to see it. Slow down and pay attention. Yes that ear flick was because you shifted in the saddle…just imagine what that means! Really! Try quietly, absently shift your weight in the saddle and see what happens where. Anything? Ears, body, tail, nothing? what about a leg on and one off….when you pick the reins off the neck….Now, try Less!

This is perhaps a new skill, or one that can always take more polishing and, yes with practice it becomes much more second nature and FUN! It certainly leads to more mutual understanding and connection….which leads to greater trust and relaxation…..which leads to deeper relationship and happy horse, happy human…… And the look on their faces tells it all……..